My Anthem. My Heartcry. My Battlecry.

As an undergraduate I struggled to keep a 3.0. For some that would be a miracle, since they do not enjoy school and or have a difficult time with it. But for someone who aspires to be a professor and attend a top notch university, that is almost like academic suicide.
I made a few poor decisions and made a habit of pushing myself too hard with a ton of things on my plate. Massive amounts of stress, lack of sleep and sometimes a day or to without eating because I couldn’t spare the 3 hours a day one spends eating; which as you can imagine, led to emotional drain and panic/anxiety attacks almost weekly.

Many friends and professors had no idea what was going on only that I seemed different. I just wasn’t turning in assignments. I wasn’t spending time with friends. I am pretty sure I cried myself to sleep a couple times, for a degree I was not sure I even wanted anymore; even as I walked across the stage at graduation a new anxiety gripped me. An echo of a new fear resonated in the auditorium, it overpowered the cheers and mass celebrations of the crowds, and it trumped the sense of victory that finishing the race should have brought.

The same phrase reverberated not just within my head, it seemed to shake the very foundations of the auditorium.

Continue reading “My Anthem. My Heartcry. My Battlecry.”

Nike Living

There are very few things in life that we are born doing really well (other than crying profusely and testing the durability claims made by diaper companies of course).
While “gifts” may be apparent and certain activities appealing, one must pursue desires and hone the skills necessary to do well.

Michael Jordan may have showed an exceptional talent, but it was his hard work that made him legendary with a basketball. Leonardo da Vinci may have captured images well in his mind, and had above average abilities in countless areas (drawing, painting, sculpting, science, philosophy); but many pencils, lumps of clay, notebooks and canvases marked the pathway towards his realized potential. Harriet Tubman may have always had a love for others and compassion for those around her, but it was her active pursuit of justice that helped sculpt her into the hero she has become to be known as.

These three individuals have, among many things, one specific commonality that I want to draw on; they were overcomers.

They were not satisfied with the status quo, they were not satisfied with “the standard”. In fact, Ii would wager that they were not satisfied with “their standard”, and they sought to better themselves day after day. I am sure that there were days where Jordan would have much rather prefered to have been with friends or family rather than run sprints; and Tubman would have wanted to safety and security rather than dangerous and death-defying living, but they most likely chose otherwise.

While I may not be the next legendary basketball player to dunk and defy the laws of gravity, nor invent the next greatest contraption, nor save countless mistreated and oppressed individuals, I still have the ability to make investments every day that will reap a tremendous reward (even if intrinsically). Although I may not go down in history, I can over come.

“But how?”, you may ask.

As I was trying to find a way to get better at writing, improve in my martial arts skills, become physically stronger, mentally stronger, emotionally intelligent, and spiritually mature and engaged, I realized there was really only one way; I needed to “just do it”. I need to write more, I need to train more, I need to think more, I need to feel more and I need to actively pursue the spiritual.

Nike, the industry/company known by it’s “Check Mark” logo, is based on the concept of “overcoming”. The Greek word νίκη, pronounced “nē’-kā” (or for those who have a hard time with understanding that, like me, “Knee-kay”) means victory, and is the root word for overcome (νικάω, nē-kä’-ō).

To be a Victor, to overcome, I need  to DO; all else is a continuation of that “doing”, it is daily and hourly intentionality, that is built every second of every minute.

Back At It

     I know this has been a very, very long term of silence, and I apologize for that. There are numerous reason for that and to cut it short, I was holding back on a lot of ideas I had because I was going to start writing for a website/blog and so did not want to “double post”. I wanted to save the very awesome things I had in mind at the time; the topics I had rising in my mind from discussions, and lectures; and simply from things that I am beginning to question about what I have been taught. Long story short, it is taking far too long to iron things out and get the details on what is to take place; honestly I think I have waited far too long and do not see it as a wise investment of my time and thoughts and work. I do want to specify, I have no ill will towards them and their site, I just do not think it would be a good decision for me at this moment.  I would rather take that time to try and revamp what I aim to do with this blog and work hard at getting this out there, up and running. Hopefully, that will mean a lot more content to come, such as collaborations or guest post here and there from other bloggers; and of course it will be a testament to how I am changing and learning and going through life. In my opinion, that last part is what is of extreme importance.

I have run into a wall when it comes to what Jesus lived out and taught. The notion of pleasing the masses coupled with social acceptance as the driving force behind actions, has resulted in an impaired ability to speak truth and live it out;it does not do Jesus justice. I hope to go a bit crazy with posting things (in the sense that I will have a bunch of things being added), but I will also be very conscious of quality. Ironically, this is being posted on New Year’s Eve and so I guess I will make this one of my many New Year’s Resolutions. Subscribe, share, and like all that you..well like. I Hope you all have a great new year ahead of you, filled with grace and peace!

Thank you God so very much for the passion I have to be true to who Your word says to be, even when I fail at holding up to it, in its entirety. Even when I fail to love You and Who You are I am brought back to Your feet embracing humility and recognizing my humanity. It is my prayer and my desire that I grow closer to You than ever before, not because this is the cliché thing to say at this time of the year but because it has been an evident need as everyday went by. I hope that I am able to make right and sound judgments and that I have the patience it takes to cultivate this site.